When Mommy wears a backpack

“Single parents bear the greatest burden of all non-traditional undergraduate students”

By Meaghan Dant

I found that I’ve grown in strength and persistence—the necessary adaptations that helped me balance all the challenges that came my way.

When women enter the world of motherhood, their lives become a juggling act. The pressure is mounted at every turn to care for their families. For some women, that means taking on the tremendous task of being not just full-time moms, but full-time students as well. The task becomes even greater for single mothers who make the difficult decision to replace a diaper bag with a backpack.

For single mothers in college, the road to graduation becomes so problematic and complicated that it keeps many from ever earning a college diploma. Diana Bruns, writing for Academic Exchange Quarterly, reports that of the five types of nontraditional undergraduate students, single parents bear the greatest burdens.

I’ve experienced the challenge of balancing school work with family time. I’m a 23-year-old senior at The University of Tennessee Chattanooga, due to graduate soon with my bachelor of arts in communication. I’m also the single mother of a young son. During this difficult journey, I’ve found that achieving a happy medium is essential to succeed, in both parenthood and academics.

The juggling act—jump-started

When I became a single mother at age 19, I knew it was imperative that I readjust my life and my goals. I was a freshman in college when I learned I was pregnant, and while the thought of dropping out of school crossed my mind, once my son came into my life I was convinced that our family had no future if I did not complete my education.

So, with unwavering support from my family and friends, I stayed positive. My son in my heart and my support system by my side, I began my journey as a single parent and college student.

College students face hardships every day. Their lives are filled with academic stress, financial worries, and the pressure to succeed. I had to learn simultaneously to be an attentive mother and a determined student; multi-tasking was a must. And my list of concerns was long: Time management, finances, tuition and expenses, childcare, academics, food and housing, and transportation are just a few issues single mothers who are college students must face.

While this new lifestyle was daunting, it wasn’t impossible. The key is cultivating a strong network, both at school and at home.

Somebody to lean on

Having a strong support system at school will make your life as a student immensely easier. Start by taking the time to get to know your professors. It’s a relief when you are able to discuss personal as well as academic issues with your professor in a confidential setting.

While a support system on campus can assist in educational success, having one at home is crucial as well.

Amanda Elmendorf, my classmate and also a single mother, knows that all too well. “I would not have made it these past two years without my family,” she says. “They have been there for me through everything.” Amanda believes that pushing through the impossible and being a single mom/college student has made her stronger in many ways. “I have realized that I can do a lot more than I thought I could. I’ve had to push myself so much more, and I know it has made me a stronger person and better mother.”

Like Amanda, I find that I’ve grown in strength and persistence—the necessary adaptations that helped me balance all the challenges that came my way.

Support, outsourced

Amanda and I were blessed with family and friends who have stood by us since day one. Some women are not so fortunate. For single mothers who want to pursue a college education, but who don’t have a strong support network, there are local organizations that can help.

The Education Opportunity Center, located at 615 McCallie Ave., aids and counsels adults who want to enter into or continue with a post-secondary education. It offers free advice to those who are unsure about their college and career path, and it provides assistance with numerous logistical challenges like earning a General Equivalency Diploma, choosing a school, applying to college, filling out the Free Application for Federal Student Aid and applying for scholarships and grants.

The EOC also provides job training as well as career assessment to those struggling to enter the work force. Preference is given to low-income adults and those who represent the first generation in their families to go to college; however, its clients also include a large number of single parents.

Earning a degree can seem like daunting task, especially to a single parent. But rather than thinking about the obstacles along that path, focus on the goal. The opportunity to better a child’s life is the greatest gift a parent can give their little one, and obtaining a college diploma is the perfect way to start.